I loathe Tillakaratne Dilshan! Don’t get me wrong, it’s not because of his cricketing skills, and it’s definitely not because he and his twin tower of destruction Upul Tharanga just smashed England in the quarter finals of this year’s World Cup. I hate the Sri Lankan Allrounder entirely for my own idiosyncratic reasons.
Till-awk-a-rawt-nee Dil-shawn, now repeat…and repeat again…this time faster…and faster again! Keep doing this over and over and you’ll have an idea of what goes on in my head, every time I hear the man’s name! No matter what time of the day Dilly’s name crosses my lips, I lie awake in bed hours later, and the only thing going on upstairs in my head is; Tillakaratne Dilshan, Tillakaratne Dilshan, Tillakaratne Dilshan! Keeping me awake at all hours without fail, just like any awful Lady Gaga song would after it has molested my ears for the first time.
For me, the whole problem dates back to my days in the ESPN STAR Sports newsroom, having to pronounce the name for the first time in a highlight pack. Tillakaratne, Tillakaratne…it was like The Little Engine That Could, “I think I can, I think I can”. And it worked, I was able to pronounce his name properly on air, but no matter what I did that night, I couldn’t get the man’s name out of my head, and the same Dilshan record-skip has occurred every other night since, even if I just read his name or glance at a photo of the man.
Confident that I had left the Dilshan curse behind when I returned home to the non-cricket loving nation of Canada, I let my guard down, only to be rick-rolled by the 34 year old again on Saturday. With a headline reading ‘Twin Tons Power Sri Lanka Victory” on Cricinfo.com my curiosity got the better of me. I clicked it and sure enough there it was, a giant photo of TM Dilshan, instantly ruining my night’s sleep in the process.
Tillakaratne Dilshan, Tillakaratne Dilshan, Tillakaratne Dilshan….
WHEN LIFE HANDS YOU A LEMON, MAKE LEMONADE
Lying there, Dilly Anger rising, something different happened this night, instead of opposing the curse I embraced it, recounting the amazing feat…
Partnering with Thanaga, the Sri Lankan openers systematically tore apart England’s bowlers chasing down 230 runs, and cruised to victory by 10 wickets and 63 balls, knocking the two-time runner-ups out of the World Cup. Nevermind the fact that Dilshan had also taken a wicket in England’s innings, it is one of the greatest sporting performances of the year, and no one west of England or east of Australia will ever hear about it.
Unable to find the comfort of my sub-conscience at night, with my curse now transformed to muse, I was able to compose the maiden contribution to this blog. And for that I have to give credit where credit is due, you were a worthy foe Mr. Tillakaratne Dilshan. I thank you for fighting the good fight, the future readers of The Scrum thank you, and most of all Canada thanks you. Why? For giving us a reason to hold our heads high when you were caught out by John Davison after a mere half-century in the group stages…we’ll conveniently forget that your Sri Lankan side beat us by 210 runs.
ESPN Cricinfo - Twin Tons Power Sri Lanka Victory
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